24. the many tangled ones

[orderfromchaos]

[Public, video]

[Dillon looks a bit - frazzled. Which is kind of impressive, for someone whose hair is always perfectly neat and whose shirts are constitutionally incapable of holding wrinkles. He has managed to put his on inside-out, though, and his shoulders are sagging, and he has a gelatinous pastel-purple thing with at least four tentacles clinging to the the side of his face. It has no apparent skull but bright white human-like buck teeth, and abyssal black eyes from which no light escapes at all.

It giggles. For a moment there's a flickering, like static - only it's not the comm that's affected. It's like the reality of Dillon's room went momentarily on the fritz. And then it's adorable again. Still.]

...does anybody know how to train a baby eldritch horror?

[He KNOWS one of you gave him this for Christmas. He. Knows. But that's not important right now.]


[Private to the Admiral]

By the way, can I add one more thing to my gift list? Since you've been delivering them kind of staggered.

For the new girl, Tiffany. I'd like to give her a copy of the gospels - just the gospels - with like, really nice leather binding and gilt edges and stuff. I don't think she's had a lot of well-made things. A translation she'd be comfortable with, one of the modern-but-poetic versions. Jerusalem Bible or New KJV, maybe? You decide.

Comments

[withtheoldbreed]

A what?

[orderfromchaos]

I think that's what it is. I don't know. Did you ever read Lovecraft? I have no idea when he was publishing.

[He grabs the squiddle around the fat, cheeks-like part of its head and pulls it off his face with an eerie, tinny squelching noise. It giggles again - with no flicker this time - and twines around his wrist instead.]

[withtheoldbreed]

No. [Gene's not much for science fiction, but Bucky has probably heard of him.]

Is it dangerous?

[orderfromchaos]

I don't know. Not to me, I think. And it's very - sweet.

But it does some weird stuff.

[versusnurture]

Um.

Seriously?

[orderfromchaos]

I mean, I can't read it at all but it kind of - fits the bill.

[versusnurture]

How exactly does it fit the - eldritch horror bill? I mean. Besides the tentacles.

You can't read it at all?

[americasdirtiest]

...okay, that shit is definitely not my fault this time.

[If only because Dillon wasn't on his gift list.]

[orderfromchaos]

Wait, the dinosaur was you?

[americasdirtiest]

Not on purpose.

[punched_hitler]

Are you sure you should try?

[Are you sure you should keep it, is almost what he means.]

[orderfromchaos]

What am I gonna do, pitch it off the side? It flies. And it apparently likes me.

Anyway, it's probably not, like, super dangerous if the admiral let me have it.

[The many, many flaws in this logic are highlighted when the thing gives a piercing little trill and the room spazzes into planck-length noise again, and back. Dillon himself, at least, seems unaffected.]

[punched_hitler]

Well... yeah, I can see how that wouldn't work. Not that that's what I was suggesting. [But. It might have been an option.

And yeah, there are flaws in that logic, but it's also kind of reasonable, as far as things go around here.] I guess if you're going to train it, though, maybe the library has something that'll help?

[He smiles helplessly.] I never had a pet, normal or otherwise, so I guess I wouldn't know where to start.

[mercurialize]

That was someone's gift to you?

[orderfromchaos]

Apparently they were a little vague.

[mercurialize]

A little?

I don't actually know what that is supposed to be, but that sounds a little more specific than vague. It also sounds bad.

[imfollowinghim]

Maybe the library has something. You two making friends?

[orderfromchaos]

Maybe so.

I think? It's very friendly.

[!frIENd! cheeps the critter, wiggling its tentacles happily, and not quick in geometrically possible configurations.]

[imfollowinghim]

I can see that. It's makin' me feel like I need glasses.

Voice

[sssiiiiirrrrr]

I don't know exactly what that is, but it probably wants water.

[In the age of sail, the sea was full of glimpses of nightmare. This tiny, awful thing is AS SCARY to Horatio as like. An octopus. Or a bunch of eels.]

Voice

[orderfromchaos]

...that is a very good point.

Voice

[sssiiiiirrrrr]

It doesn't... seem unhappy, though? Do you know what it might want to eat?

[darknessb4me]

Kill it before it grows.

[orderfromchaos]

It's not Becket's fault it got taken from...wherever it belongs.

[The static thing happens again, several flickers in quick succession. The creature puffs its bell, flying jellyfish-style to peer at Arthas, apparently fascinated.]

[darknessb4me]

I don't care. Once it -

[Arthas swats at the camera, as if he could reach through and bat the thing aside.]

Stop. Once it's big enough to envelop your head you'll be worse than dead.